There once was a hardworking owl. Who eventually smelled pretty fowl. So he took a shower, For over an hour, Then wrapped himself up in a towel.
A sneaky and cunning raccoon, Stole some trash mid afternoon. Exceptionally keen, The raccoon was not seen, And escaped to his waiting platoon.
There once was a cowardly hare, Who decided to go to the fair. A small Ferris wheel, Made him tremble and squeal, And frightened him beyond repair.
When Jason found he couldn’t sleep, He decided to hire some sheep. But they ate up his throw, So he told them to go. And swore ’cause they didn’t come cheap. He should have looked at their Yelp reviews.
There once was an intrusive fly, Who simply refused to die. I attempted to kill, But it wouldn’t keep still. It was quick and surprisingly sly.
A parrot named Polly was wed, To an old vulture named Fred. But Fred was not rich, So she decided to ditch, And she packed up her things and fled. Poor Fred. </3
The ducks at the lake were all fed, A diet of crumbly bread. They found it a bore, And petitioned for more, And were given fish eggs instead. Only the most expensive caviar would do.
A gnome went to happy hour, But it made his stomach feel sour. He called his friend Jerome, To get a ride home, And then took a freezing cold shower. Don’t drink and drive. Even if the thing you’re driving is a giant snail. …What does a snail look like when it’s swerving? …Could aContinue reading “Thursday Limerick: Don’t drink and drive.”
I write too many limericks about California and Washington. Here’s a limerick about (rolls dice) Nevada: Suddenly Vegas is there. It came out of the sand from nowhere. If you brought a buck, You can try out your luck, But don’t complain it isn’t fair.
When the doctor looked at her chart, He said Bernice needed a heart. But where could she find, An organ of that kind? She lucked out at her local Walmart. They really have everything, don’t they? If she was in the Northwest, she could have tried Fred Meyer.