When the blogger decided to write, Outrage he hoped to incite. But the internet mob, Made him whimper and sob, And gave him a terrible fright.
The tables were greasy with scum, And the undersides covered in gum. The owner was mean, And refused to clean, And he lived on a diet of rum.
James wanted the entire scone, But he couldn’t bear living alone. So he took out a knife, And gave half to his wife, And was not forced to live on his own.
A lactose intolerant fairy, Who couldn’t consume any dairy, Tried hard to think, Of an alternate drink, And finally settled on sherry.
A mortal should always be wary, Of making a deal with a fairy. You could end up with a curse, You can not reverse, The idea of which is quite scary. Potential curses include: All coffee turns to decaf the moment it touches your lips. The unsubscribe button on your spam emails doesn’t work. ForcedContinue reading “Thursday Limerick: More Advice”
A fish was unusually bold. So into college he enrolled. The sight of a bass, In an algebra class, Was certainly one to behold.
There once was a fellow named Bill, A cookie he’d fight for and kill. He was so filled with hate, He stole from Santa’s plate, And what he got for Christmas was nil.
A fur tree of towering height, Decorated with ornaments bright, Fell near the cat, Almost knocking him flat, And gave him a horrible fright.
In the aquarium in Atlanta, Resided a ravenous manta. He wanted more fish, To add to his dish, So he wrote a letter to Santa. There are like two words that rhyme with “Santa” but by an amazing stroke of luck, there is an aquarium with manta rays in Georgia.
Insisting that she was the boss, Of making the cranberry sauce, Darlene picked a fight, And was up half the night, Being disgruntled and cross. Between you and me, I like the canned stuff. Yes, that stuff that’s unnaturally red and keeps the shape of the can when you dump it. Delicious! Bonus! Here isContinue reading “Thursday Limerick: Don’t Be Darlene”