Thursday Limerick: Paranoid Chicken

It turns out, the chicken’s fears were well founded. He was eaten with ranch. He was delicious.
There once was a paranoid chicken. 
Conspiracies made his heart quicken.
Though the goats and the swine,
Told him things were fine,
He spent the rest of his life panic-stricken.

Thursday Limerick: The Political Snake

Figure A
There once was an arrogant snake,
Who thought he could make no mistake.
But when he ran and won,
And his term had begun,
His excellence was proven fake.

Democrats: “Oh we know who this is about.”

Republicans: “We know who this is actually about.”

Me: “Oh, you thought this was a metaphor for some actual human politician? No. This is literally about a snake who ran for office. See figure A.” *Rolls eyes*