He had a strict routine for irritating people. He would begin his day going into one stall in every restroom across the terminal and shredding an entire roll of toilet paper.
Category Archives: Humor
How to Fight a Fairy Part 2.2
Alexander made a mark on the wall every morning, counting the days of his captivity. The more scratches he made, the more he longed for human companionship.
How to Bond with Barbarians
Getting kidnapped by a princess was the pinnacle of humiliation.
How to Avoid Assassination
STOP! This story won’t make much sense unless you’ve read How to Kill a King. It might not make sense after that either. But then, do any of my stories make sense? Other stories referenced, but not essential to your understanding: Scott the CEO Elves vs Elves Now where was I? Para Sympan, Middle Ages, SoutheasternContinue reading “How to Avoid Assassination”
Love is in the Air
Fighter jets circle the airport every spring to protect passenger planes. Most dragons won’t fly above ten thousand feet, so defense is only required during takeoff and landing. Dragons are a protected species. While it is illegal to shoot them down, it is acceptable to scare them off with a warning shot. Usually this is sufficient. Usually.
Coming February 7th
When human technology confuses wild animals, it can pose a real safety hazard. Like when a dragon falls hopelessly in love with what it thinks is another dragon, but is actually a 737. Come back on February 7th to read my new short Love is in the Air.
How to Kill a King
“I blame myself really,” Fausta recalled. “The first was carrying me off after our wedding celebration, when he tripped and landed on my knife. The second died during our wedding feast when I accidentally spilled hemlock juice in his drink, and the third died of a heart attack after our vows. I don’t blame myself for that one, he was a very old man. It was just luck, I suppose.”
Elves vs Elves: A Christmas Miracle
“You have beautiful hair!” She noticed. “It’s so soft and shiny, like in a shampoo commercial!” Her fellows all agreed—all the elves, both short and tall, agreed. Even by elvish standards, Sertraline had amazing hair. That’s why they made him king.
Coming Nov. 7th
The victor of the ancient feud is about to be selected. Will the elves be victorious? Or will it be the elves? Find out on Friday in Elves vs Elves: A Christmas Miracle.
Davy of the Sound
Dave was rushed to the Mackerel Valley Emergency room. He’d been walking across the bridge on his way to work when he was mugged, brutally beaten, and tossed over the railing. If that wasn’t bad enough, some idiot left a wood chipper parked under the bridge. As Dave fell toward the open funnel, he instinctivelyContinue reading “Davy of the Sound”
The Fables of Para Sympan 